The Sixth Year

The Sixth Year at Riverside meant we were at the end of our elementary school journey. We were also at the end of the building. As with all the grades, there were two sixth grade classes: Mr. Willy's and Mr. McGuffin's.

I was in Mr. McGuffin's class, and that fact heralded another change moving to the sixth grade.

The sixth grade teachers were MEN.

Yes, it's true! Men teachers. We had heard stories in the Fifth Grade about what was expected from Men teachers. Better behavior, obedience, Yes Sir No Sir attitude.

But, what weighed heavily on our minds was one thing: swats.

Men teachers gave swats.

Now, modern readers might wonder what a "swat" is and I don't blame them. Corporal punishment has not been a part of education practice for many years, but back in my day at Riverside the swat was something to be feared.

The first day of class, in fact, Mr. McGuffin showed us his swatter. It was a magazine that had been rolled up tightly and wrapped in masking tape. As an illustration he smacked it against the blackboard a few times for effect. Chalk dust flew and we all jumped in our seats.

Class was very quiet.

I think, in retrospect, that was the purpose of the demonstration. To my knowledge Mr. McGuffin only used the swat once, maybe twice. I seem to recall a day, it was probably raining (bad stuff always happened on rainy days) where he gave the entire class a swat; girls, too. It wasn't much of a swat and it could have been a game or distraction for all I know.

The bottom line is that the Swatting Era was not all that traumatic. We survived and lived to tell the tale.

What I remember most about Mr. McGuffin's class, however, is art. Mr. McGuffin was quite an artist and we spent many class hours drawing murals in colored chalk on the board. Also, he taught us perspective. We had to write an original story and illustrate it. I still have my story and a picture, in perspective, that I drew in chalk in his class.

We came away from the Sixth Grade with discipline, a respect for each other and an appreciation of art which, at least for this person, has stood the test of time.

Thank you, Mr. McGuffin, wherever you are, for helping to shape our lives.

Postscript

In the class photo Mr. McGuffin stands there implacable, like Rod Serling introducing an episode of the Twilight Zone.

I can almost hear McGuffin-Serling describing the scene. Something like this...

Standing before you, anticipating the flash of the camera, is the Class of 1963. Twenty-six young men and women who at this moment have no idea what is in store for them around the next corner, through the next door or even if they will leave the stage they are standing on. They don't realize at this point in time that the stage they are standing on is a stage in their lives, and from this stage they will act out twenty-six different dramas with twenty-six different endings. They're smiling now but the smiles will fade when they step down, face a cold, stark reality and enter their real lives in...

The Twilight Zone

*cue Twilight Zone music*